KaSE STUdY:  FORMER TEAChER N

Former Teacher Z gives us the 411 on the country that everybody loves the name of:  Costa Rica.  He reassures us that the cops aren't going to cornhole us. 

Where did you teach, and for how long?

I taught in Costa Rica for two schools: English Academy of Costa Rica and Pro-English/Pro-Language. There are other English schools in some of the beach towns, but the majority of the English schools are in the capitol, San Jose. Pro-English is a pretty legit school, maybe the MOST legit school in the country. I taught for about a year (off and on).

 

What were the living conditions like?

The Pacific Beaches are more or less all gorgeous and can be as cheap or as expensive as you want them to be. I lived in Manuel Antonio, Playa Jaco and visited Tamarindo. I didn't teach English at any of those places. San Jose (SJ), as I have written on BootsNAll.com, is a dirty, miserable, little city. Most people live in the suburbs, which, once again are as nice or shabby as you want to pay for. I lived in the Gran Hotel Imperial for a while. It's in downtown SJ and very cheap: $5/night (shared bathroom, etc). FYI: Pay in colones, not dollars, because the colone price ends up being less than $5. The Gran Imperial is the closest thing to a real youth hostel that Costa Rica has. It's in a bad part of the city but if you keep your head up then you'll be ok. I lived in a "nice" apartment in San Pedro (the University district) for about $250/month. All in all, as long as you stay out of the "zona roja" (red zone) downtown then you s hould be fine and it's tranquil. Oh, and for the whoremongers among us, "red zone" has less to do with prostitution than robbery and violent crime. Hookers are everywhere, especially Gringo Gulch in San Jose.

 

How were the students?

 

Costa Ricans are suspicious people. Since I am Latino, sometimes they would make a face because I guess they thought the school was sending them another Costa Rican to teach them English. You have to be assertive. I would immediately straighten everybody's ass out from the get-go by breaking out with my Southern accent. My first class the leader of the Costa Rican Football Federation (think NFL and US Olympic committee rolled into one) was so embarrassed by his assumption that he took me out for beers after class on the first day. Most students wanted to learn certainly more than I wanted to teach.

How often did you get laid?

I got laid more with American women than with Costa Rican women (save the whores). This is, once again, because I am Latino. Sometimes I would lie and say that I was Costa Rican but had been educated in the States, or maybe I would affect an accent, etc. Whatever story might separate them from their panties the quickest. But a good looking Colombian hooker at a nice whorehouse is no more than $40 and in some of the less quality establishments which might be hot and cold as far as quality of looks, you could sometimes find a good looking girl for as little as $15. Never pay more than $60. In many places they will ask for $100. Everything is negotiable. Never pick up a girl off the street. It'll either be a transvestite or she will be underage. Unless, of course, that sort of thing floats your boat. But be advised.

I never touched one of my students because I never had that many women in my classes. The women in Costa Rica, on average, are beautiful.

 

Is it all hot and full of bugs there?

 

At the beaches it's certainly hot because Costa Rica is 9 degrees from the equator. Bugs are only a marginal problem, I thought. The elevation of San Jose keeps the climate very moderate. But the May through November rainy season will definitely put limits on your movement wherever you are.

Was the salary enough to keep the wolves from the door?

Yes, typically about $650/month...that is barely enough. You don't need working papers because you are never really in one place. There is a lot of traveling to be done teaching English in Costa Rica. That's what wears at you. I did have a friend though who made about $1000/month but he taught from 7am to 10pm everyday. Too much for me.

 

How much is a beer there compared to the cost of living?

 

Cerveza Imperial and Pilsen, the national beers, are about $.60, in a Tico (Costa Ricans call themselves Ticos) bar. For instance, in Bar 1930 in SJ, you could get a small meal, a beer, and a pack of smokes for about $3.50. Never drink in an American bar and do not drink Budweiser or Heineken or any other beer that you are familiar with because it isn't the same as what you get in the US.
 

Do cops ever arrest you for no reason and take you to the station and
cornhole you or anything like that?

Well, I got deported three times. The last time they actually sent me out of the country. But again, the double edged sword of being an American of Latino descent  in a Latin American country, was what caused all of it. My look is more indegenous like someone from Peru, Nicarauga or Guatemala (I'm actually of Mexican descent). Ticos hates Nicas because they blame them for everything. That was why the cops ever hassled me in the first place, but each time I had overstayed my visa by a significant amount of time (Americans are allowed 90 days)...and the only reason I ever had a problem was that I either didn't have my passport or not enough money to bribe my way out of it. For white people, you NEED the bribe money (¢10.00 or less), but there is less chance of them hassling you. They aren't violent towards you though. They know they need the tourism, they just want the graft